That’s Stella

I feel comfortable telling you about this now that the experience is in my past. I’m bringing it up now because I just told my best friend about it whilst I was sitting in my favorite cafe and couldn’t stop cracking up reminiscing.

So far, I’ve only cried once on this trip.

No, it wasn’t because I was missing my mom and dad. Nor was it because I missed my darling puppy back at home. And it wasn’t because I missed my closest friends. Or the comfort of my own bed. Or the full access to my wardrobe.

After LA, we spent time with my Travel Buddies relatives in their magnificent house in Oregon. This place was AMAZING. It was close to the city and well, when they adopted me as part of the family and said I was welcome to stay anytime, I was smitten. But our stay there was very short. We moved onto another relatives house in Washington. But let me just tell you, it wasn’t SEATTLE, Washington, but out in freakin’ country Washington. Oh. My. Gosh.

I’m allergic to the country. I causes me to suffer from severe anxiety and temporary insanity. I experience insomnia (the silence and unfamiliar sounds keeps me up at night) and the isolation makes me feel like I’m living The Shining-esque experience. Who could really blame Jack Nicholson for going mad and wanting to murder his wife and cute as a button kid?

When we arrived at Aunt Mirna’s house, I put on a brave face and tried to be charming, but as soon as we were shown our room, I sat on the bed and cried. Boy Travel Buddy tried to comfort me, but I told him I was homesick and missed LA man (this was partly true - I did miss LA man because he was in LA and LA is a big CITY). I didn’t tell him the truth - that I was freaking the fuck out about being so far away from civilisation.

I also have a major fear of all insects so combine the fact that we were in the middle of freakin nowhere and our room was infested with LADYBUGS (everywhere), it made it very difficult to get to sleep each night.

After my first night, I realised that by putting a glass of root beer under a switched on lamp, by the next morning, it had attracted 10-15 ladybugs and they were floating (read: drowned) in a sea of r00t beer goodness.

Hell. I’d like to say I was sad. But, I don’t care how cute ladybugs apparently are, they are still insects and can crawl into your bodily orifices and cause havoc.

I love listening to Alexis Weissenberg “Suite Bergmanesque - 3″ when I’m roaming particularly busy streets of NYC. It makes the crowds of tourists and slow moving footpath traffic a little more bearable.

Another reason I’m looking forward to moving into my own studio: My house mate has been eating my granola! Firstly let me say that I am all up for sharing. I’ve lived with two house mates previously and it was all sharing is caring and making big dinners for everyone and taking it in turns to cook. But when my housemate holds tight reigns on her Haagan Daazs, then there is no reason she should be eating my yummy granola! I mean, I don’t blame her. I should’nt have just left the jar in the cupboard for all to see - it looks amazing. Apple, raspberry and cinnamon granola clusters. Oy! To die for. It was also a tad pricey, hence why I was a little pissed to see half the jar gone.

I am moving out next Wednesday. I am actually really sad to leave this place. I’m only 200 metres away, but the only thing my new apartment is missing is a front stoop to sit on to wait for friends or people watch.

I spent my Saturday afternoon laying on the grass in Central Park reading the New York Times. I had magnificent views of grand buildings lined up along Central Park South, but I was amongst the greenery. I bought a chocolate covered ice cream and iced tea, kicked off my ballet flats and wriggled my toes. I listened to Air on my iPod and in between reading and people watching, I looked up into the bright blue skies and cherry blossom trees that hung above me.

When I walked home along my street lined with brownstone houses, there was a slight breeze and I was showered with white flower petals.

I purposely got ready early, went downstairs and sat outside on my apartment stoop waiting for my friends to come and fetch me for dinner. I watched people eating outside at the restaurant on the next block and people walking their dogs or coming home with grocery bags. I saw people carrying Trader Joes brown paper bags and grinned because I knew the pain of shopping there. Groceries are super cheap, but the only Trader Joe’s in Manhattan was 10 blocks away from my neighborhood and it was always a struggle going home.

Later in the evening after dinner, we headed to the White Horse Tavern and sat on picnic tables outside on Hudson Street, drinking beer and checking out the crowd.

I walked past Magnolia Bakery on my way home and smiled at the line of people that wrapped around the block - all for frosted cupcakes!

Life is oh so sweet right now.

I heard from our friend that he was going to be in town this week. I hadn’t heard from him and was a little taken aback he hadn’t told me. We had a great time hooking up in LA and he’s been the one calling me and trying to hook me up for dinner with his mom to meet her.

I was at Explosions in the Sky on Tuesday night when I finally got a text from him saying he arrived on Monday night for business and wanted to see me. I had always dreamed of seeing Explosions in the Sky (an AMAZING band - romantic and intense) with a loved one and was a little disappointed I missed my opportunity.

Anyway he called the next morning and asked me out. He said he was here on business and had to have dinner with his boss and colleague that night and wanted to introduce me and his best friend to them. I said yes - I wanted to see him so badly, but hours before meeting him I tried to think of ways to get out of it for some reason.

Dinner was amazing. AMAZING. We went to a really beautiful restaurant. It was buzzing with people and it was dark and fancy but had soul. A pianist and saxophonist played in the background. It was a fixed menu and the service was like none I have experienced before.

During dinner, he put me on the phone with his mom and she told me she heard a lot about me and wanted to meet me soon and invited me over for dinner. She sounded really sweet.

I nearly had a heart attack when I saw the bill. I knew he would pay, but I was planning to do the polite thing and offer to pay my share. Let me say, thank God he said I didn’t have to worry about it before I could get my wallet out because my $40 definitely would not have covered it. My share alone was $345. Yes. My share alone. The bill in total was something like $2k. My meal that night is pretty much my living expenses budget for a week and a half. INSANE.

We made out but it was his best friend who took me home in his sports car because he had to work that night since he flew out the next day.

I’m in a pickle. So my Girl Travel Buddy (GTB) is back from her jaunt around Europe. She’s been away for a month. Before she left for Europe, we said goodbye to Boy Travel Buddy (BTB) as he went back to Perth and that was sad because it was like the three amigos had split up.

Anyway GTB is staying at my apartment for a week till she gets herself settled and that is totally cool - obviously. Luckily for her my house mates are also cool about this. But now she has decided she is going to stay in a hostel for the rest of the month. It’s kinda sucky, but she can’t stay in my apartment as this isn’t fair to my house mates. It’s a tiny apartment as it is with 3 people living in it, let along 4 or 5 (we have another guest coming to stay this month). To be fair, there was a vacant room in our apartment and I offered it to GTB but she didn’t want to commit to anything and NOW she’s screwed herself over.

Now in May, I’m moving into my new apartment. And GTB wants to share the apartment with me and at first I was cool with this because she’d pay half the rent, but since having her stay with me this week, I don’t know if this is going to work out. At least in this apartment, despite how cramped it is, there are separate rooms and a lounge room. GTB is really incapable of going out on her own and exploring the city, so I feel like she is constantly with me 24/7!! The other night I was SO cranky because I cooked us lunch and it would’ve been NICE of her to offer to help wash the dishes. So I started washing and she offered to wash the dishes and I said OK. The next night the dishes were still there and when I asked about them, she said she was “taking back” her offer to wash the dishes. So I ended up cleaning! FRICK! I asked if she wouldn’t mind hanging in the lounge room for 30 minutes because I needed “Me time” and she acted all offended.

I mean, despite how annoying she can be sometimes (hell, I am too) I actually don’t want to hate her after May so I told her she MIGHT need to find her own place. My new place is a nice studio, but there are no rooms and no privacy and place for personal time! Plus admittedly, I was really looking forward to having my own place.

Of course I feel terrible because she doesn’t have any friends here in NY except me, but she’s not exactly trying either. If we live together in May, I’m not going to be able to go out with my friends on my own because I’ll feel bad about leaving her at home and honestly, I don’t want to become like a two-person act. I discussed this with her tonight after I came home from a date, and told her that there was no way one could go out without inviting the other, and she said “But I let you go out on your own tonight!” and I had to remind her IT WAS A DATE and not inviting her was a given!

It is a wonder how we travelled for 7 weeks together living in small hotel rooms or relatives bedrooms, but I think we survived because Boy Travel Buddy was our buffer.

Plus… I must admit I am a little bitter she has seemed to bypassed the most excruciating experience that New Yorkers go through - apartment hunting. I feel like she waits for me to find a cushy place and then decides to join the party. It is definitely a lesson everyone should experience to really appreciate and love your home!

What do you think? Is it better to be a good person and let her live with my in May but hate her at the end of it? Or ask her to find her own place and still remain friends?

My sublet at my apartment is coming to an end this month. I’ve already been looking for my May apartment, more then a month in advance, especially seeing as this apartment was so hard to find in the first place. I’ve come to love this place despite the flaws that I’ve listed below to make me love even MORE the new place I found for May. It is quite a gem (let me just say, my own studio, balcony and elevator) but I’ll tell you more about it when I move in. Here’s my list of flaws of my current place:

1) The NARROW bathroom
When you sit on the crapper, your nose is a mere 10 cms from the wall if you’re sitting slightly hunched. This really rules out any chance of getting any decent reading done in there.

2) CREAKY wooden floors
They are SO loud. I pretty much know all the bowel movement times of my housemates and they know mine because we have to walk past each others rooms and make a racket walking on the floors to get to the bathroom. You can also hear the neighbours on the top floor.

3) NEIGHBOURS (in other buildings)
When you stand in our kitchen cooking, our neighbour in the building NEXT DOOR can pretty much see you tearing up as you chop onions and can SMELL what you’re cooking. This is especially awkward because I like to cook in my pyjamas. The other day I heard someone sneezing and I thought it was my house mate - it wasn’t. It was the man on the top floor in the building next door. I could’ve whispered “Bless you” and he would’ve heard me. I thank GOD none of the neighbours are getting any because that would be really awkward and I would be envious.

4) HOUSEMATES
I think I got really lucky with my housemates considering horror stories I’ve heard from others (New York is full of mental people and kleptomaniacs apparently.) However, numero uno flaw with the housemates is their laziness! I am always the one taking out the garbage (down 5 flights of stairs) 3x a week, vacuuming, sweeping, mopping…So the other day, the light in the bathroom blew a fuse and as a lesson I decided not to do anything about it and would let them deal with something for once. I have my showers in the morning when I can get natural light so I’m not fussed. My house mates response? My American housemate moves out of the apartment for a fucking week and the Aussie housemate (who is 6ft and is the most capable to do anything about the high ceiling light) goes to the deli across the road and buys a candle.

5) 5 FLIGHTS OF STAIRS
Enough said. The UPS man or delivery boy always gives us evils. I am in the habit now of tipping generously. Usually you tip 15% but the other night my Chinese came to $12 and I still gave the delivery man a $5 tip - $1 for every flight of stairs.

Easter didn’t really FEEL like Easter this year. I tried to pinpoint exactly what it was that was missing, and came to the conclusion it was the lack of relief for the long weekend. Firstly, not only do a lot of people work on Good Friday here, but stores are open on Easter Sunday. Add to that the fact I haven’t been working, there really wasn’t that excitement for a weekend with plans of long drives or last season BBQ’s with family and friends before the weather gets too chilly.

I can’t imagine Easter egg hunting is as fun over here in New York for kids. I mean, parents would just have to hide them in their tiny apartments. I have fond memories of searching for colourful aluminium wrapped eggs in the garden and under leafy plants.

At first I thought my Easter was going to be pretty quiet and I planned to ignore it, but it turned out to be such a memorable day. My girl friends asked me to meet them for a bout of shopping so we spent a couple of hours roaming the streets and popping into the normal chains. We stopped by street vendors and I bought a $5 pair of sunglasses! Bargain! In the afternoon we walked back to the Village to have afternoon tea, and discovered this street fair just at the cross street to my apartment!! My road was blocked off for the fair and there were these markets with cheap jewellery and art and clothes and knick knacks and AMAZING street food - fried pork, cajun rice, sweet potatoes, herbed chicken, corn dogs, satays and deserts. I wanted to try all the food. I settled with fried Oreos!! (Oreos in batter deep fried coated with icing sugar). I had one and threw then rest away. The place was colourful and the sun was shining. It was one of the most amazing days I’ve experienced. I was thankful for the sun and the sounds and the sights and smells and amazing friends who were just as excited about the day as I was. We had afternoon tea at a nearby cake shop and I ended up going back to the street fair to buy some food for dinner that night.

Easter was bearable without family because I have my Jewish friends who seem completely oblivious to the holiday. Christmas on the other hand (even though my Jewish folk don’t celebrate it) will be completely unbearable on my own.

My good friend Mike has a motto “Leave the party when it’s fun”. I know it might sound ridiculous, but I thought I learnt my lesson when Mike and I were at our friends birthday party. I was having a fabulous time flirting with this guy and Mike (who acts like the big brother I always wanted) insists on leaving and I act like the bratty sister he never wanted and tell him he’s dreaming and go drink more whilst I wrap up this deal.

Anyway, all of a sudden, I shit you not, but it’s like the clock struck 12 and everyone just LEFT. This guy I’m flirting with tells me to come out with him, but I’m wearing the mother fucker stilettos from hell and tell him I’ll go to Mikes (where I always have a change of clothes/shoes) to change my foot attire. Anyway to cut to the chase, Perth has the WORST taxi service in the whole universe and Mike and I are the LAST ones at this party waiting for a cab. I mean, the host was hosing down his yard and packing up chairs and the mojito machine whilst we were waiting. I got an earful from Mike and it was horrible, because he was right.

Anyway I thought I learnt my lesson, but apparantly I didn’t because last night, I had another case of regret not leaving the party when it was going well, instead of rock bottom.

So bear with me as I try to be as discrete as possible…

I went to see these semi-famous bands play. I ended up going SOLO because my friend flaked out and couldn’t go and I really didn’t want to miss out. I kinda thought people might befriend me being alone and all, but that really wasn’t the case. Ha! So much for positive thinking. Luckily there were a few smiles exchanged with one of the guys from the band and we end up talking… then flirting… then talk about going out the next night… and then finally the exchange of numbers. Now THIS is the point where I should’ve left, but no. Silly me. I couldn’t help myself.

Five fucking hours later, we are sitting at the bar, we are both completely sloshed and he is rubbing my back and patting my hair from what I can only think is him being loyal, because we are both pursuing conversation elsewhere because talking to each other is the last thing we want to do.

And I regret not leaving earlier, because I am sure if we were out at some hole in the wall restaurant the next night and could actually hear each other to get to know each other, it would’ve possibly worked out, but from our time together I thought he was sweet, but oh so BORING. I craved this rich conversation and a back and forth of intellect and similar interests, but he didn’t know who MacGyver was and never watched Groundhog Day. C’mon! I’m by no means a fan of MacGyver but was he completely oblivious to the 80’s?

So I FINALLY leave at 3am and we are so sick of each other that no one dares to mention seeing each other again.

Me - Ok. I’m leaving. Bye.
Rocker - Ok Bye.
Me - Bye.
Rocker - Did I spend enough time with you?
Me - No. But it was fun.
Rocker - Oh…
Me - Bye.

I just wish I would learn already. I have such an attraction to rockstars with skinny leg jeans and some vintage shirt that I always seem to forget they never seem to be able to offer me any goods in the personality department. Sorry - sweeping generalisation. But give me someone who can talk to me about movies, and art, and pop culture, and travel!

Oh another thing - this band had a groupie of girls travelling with them from Oz. And well, they were THE unfriendliest bunch of bitches I have ever met. Since when did it become cool to be a groupie?

Right now, there is a middle age French man sitting next to me at Au Bon Pain who keeps tutting and cursing LOUDLY under his breath because he seems to have lost something. His older handsome dark good looks and accent still does nothing for him. Highly un-charming. It is KILLING ME. Why can’t this man control himself? I want to slap him across the face with a baguette.

I did have a rather tasty seeded nut bagel. SO delicious. Crumbs cupcakes are across the road so if I’m feeling particularly naughty I might make a stop off. I went for a 2 hour walk this afternoon so of course any thing I gained from that will be lost when I tuck into the cupcake frosting.

MMmm… frosting…

So, this morning at 3am I was walking back to my apartment from my friends place and stopped by my regular deli so I could get my favorite ever chocolate beverage - Yoohoo! I have three deli’s all within the vicinity of 100 metres from my apartment, but I go to my regular deli 2 blocks away only because they are the only deli close by that sells Yoohoo, plus the deli assistant is always really friendly, and not in a “Hey hoochie mama want some action tonight?” friendly which has been the case in a deli on 14th and another on 6th ave.
Anyway tonight I went to get my fix of Yoohoo, and there were none on the shelves! I was devastated! It looked like it had been replaced by this organic SOY chocolate milk beverage in one of those juice box type cartons. I mean, bloody hell, if I want something good for me, I would just drink water, screw organic and screw soy! I want Yoohoo!
SO, I thought I would go out of my comfort zone and purchased Nesquick chocolate milk. I’m pretty sure we have this in Australia but never tried it. Anyway I didn’t really have high expectations and lucky, because it is TERRIBLE. There is no yummy chocolatey goodness that Yoohoo provides. Poor poor poor! I need a chocolate fix and am now regretting not getting those packet of peanut butter m&m’s that were trying to tempt me at the register.
ARGH!

10:30am
Alarm clock goes off. Wake up. Yes, life is sweet for some. Have a shower and dressed.
11:30am
Friends buzz my apartment and I let them in. They walk up 5 flights of stairs just to get to my door. That is love just there folks.
11:45am
We walk down my street which happens to be one of the most beautiful streets of NY and take pictures of the brownstones with my friends new fish eye camera. The sun is shining and it’s a nice 5 degree day.
12:00
100m from my stoop is a coffee shop that prouds itself on taking out the Best Coffee in NY in 2004. Celebrities are also known to stumble in weary eyed after a big night out. We go in and my friends get coffees, whilst I opt for the hot Chai and read the newspaper.
1:00
We walk further in to the West Village and line up for lunch at Bonsignour. The food is all tempting and reminds me of Tarts back in Perth. It is packed and we are lucky to nab the table by the window for maximum sunlight and people watching. I chose the meatloaf and swiss cheese with tomato sandwich on 7 grain bread with beetroot vinaigrette salad and Nantucket Half and Half (lemonade and tea). There is a cute black man wearing a beret behind the counter serving customers and singing and occasionally dancing to Diana Ross & The Supremes Love Child. A dischevelled hot guy wearing wayfarers and a leather jacket walks in. My friend grabs my arm and tells me he’s from the TV show The OC. I have to tell him to be cool and loosen his claw him my arm. Lots of ladies and men walk in with their hand bag size dogs dressed up in doggy couture.
2:30
We walk along my favorite street - Bleecker and walk through the parks and window shop.
2:40
We walk into Magnolia Bakery and admire the cup cakes. We share a Peanut Butter Blondie and get a hot cider to keep us warm.
2:50
We walk further along Bleecker St and pop into Marc Jacobs and the Marc Jacobs clearance store further down the block. I buy a MJ metallic purple key tag for the collection of keys.
3:30
I pop into a gift store and buy some wrapping paper for gifts for mum and dad. I found a $2 Englebert Humperdink record for dad at the Chelsea Antique Flea Market on Sunday.
4:00
Friends come back to my apartment for a drink.
4:30
Say goodbye to friends and fall asleep on my bed for an afternoon nanny nap.
6:00
I head out to the grocery store on 14th and buy ingredients for my friends Turkey Meatballs recipe. I have to remind myself that I have to drag my groceries back 5 blocks to my apartment and up 5 flights of stairs and refrain from buying anything heavy. I am too stingy to pay for delivery!
7:00
Arrive back at home and decide I am too lazy to cook anything extraordinary tonight and settle on chicken, mushroom, broccoli and water chestnut stir fry.
8:30
Receive a text message from my neighbourhood friend “What R U doing? Feel like ice cream?”. One word response back to her - “YES”
8:45
My buddy meets me out the front of my place and we walk to Yolato on 6th avenue. I get the birthday cake gelato scoop and we chat about cute boys we fancy.
10:00
We walk the long way back to my apartment out of guilt and say goodbye to my buddy.
I watch a Curb Your Enthusiasm mini marathon.
1:00
Goodnight

So, I know this might sound strange, but I’ve fallen into a Jewish community here in New York. I find this slightly strange because I am not Jewish. I mean, don’t get me wrong - I have no problem with it because I have a secret attraction to Jewish men and what better way to meet them then to hang out with them and their friends.

I’ve been attending Shabbat (Friday night dinners) and practicing their religion because I don’t want to be disrespectful and stick out like a sore thumb. I am pretty much down with all their customs, except reading the Hebrew prayers before and after Shabbat. I mean, I am hardly the right person to tell you the Jewish customs, but it’s things like not using electricity/exchanging money from Friday sundown till an hour after Saturday sundown and eating kosher food and not mixing dairy and meat. I’m not strict on this because I’M NOT JEWISH, but tonight, instead of using a cab or subway to get across town to our friends apartment, I walked with my friend, even though it was PISSING down with rain this evening. My boots were flooded. Also, I made sure my cell phone was turned off and other little things.

Anyway, tonight I was the only person at this huge dinner party of 20 that wasn’t Jewish but I must say I was impressed with myself that I knew what to do and didn’t talk from the time I washed my hands till the challah bread is shared and could join in on the customs and not look like a total tool.

There were 3 guys to every girl and oh my goodness, it was like a candy store. Of course the really hot guy was the only guy that didn’t introduce himself to me and I later found out from the other chicks that he knows he’s attractive and a bit full of himself. But just as I was thinking about leaving, this really attractive guy arrived and I decided to stick around. He dressed really well and had nice blue eyes and seemed friendly. He introduced himself to me but there were so many people around it was hardly the right time to get to know him. So he finally seperates from the group to get up and wash the dishes! So after some time I decide to get up and get a drink and see if he needs a hand.

“Do you need a hand?” was all it took from me to get him to ask the question I always get asked “Where are you from?!” and I lapped up the attention from being the foreigner. Haha! He said he loved my accent and we needed to hang out and yada yada! Anyway I end up leaving my friends place early in the morning and despite it being completely out of his way and add to that the rotten weather, he asks if he can walk me home!

In my head I was already thinking about what our childrens names will be and if I would convert to Judaism and if our children would have Hebrew names and if I could really convert considering how much I love bacon and pork and cheeseburgers (oh my!). But all my fantasies came to a screeching halt when I found out on our walk to my place that he was gay. Like really homosexual. Honestly, I felt like an idiot. I should’ve known by his designer pants and Dolce and Gabbana belt buckle and impeccable black shiny shoes. I wondered if I had the power to make him change teams, but as soon as he started dancing on the corner of 2nd Avenue and 10th, I decided it wasn’t going to happen.

Shabbat and the rituals are really interesting. If interested, check out more about the rituals here.