You gotta roll with it…
Here’s the lowdown - no bullshit or sugar glazing.
I am miserable at my new job. The people are “nice” but I don’t fit in. Not because I’m not nice, but everyone is so cushy with each other, I feel like I’ve invaded some secret society. Man, I am really easy to get along with. Honest. I’ve never had this problem at other agencies. I just don’t feel… comfortable.
My days start at 5am. I have a nervous breakdown on St Georges Terrace during the morning traffic jam. I start to get a little grumpy by 3pm when I realise I’ve missed out on breakfast and won’t have anytime for lunch. I finish work by 8pm. Get home and sleep by 9:30pm. I’m practically living at work. Hence why uncomfortableness leads to miserableness. Every morning I have to remind myself how fucking lucky I am and how I am worthy, but my mantra is wearing a little thin.
Only three days into my new job and it was already taking a toll on me. I ended up “sick” (read - tired and sad) and went home by midday. I was in a deep snooze when Mr. London called for a chat. I was completely out of it and admitted that I was at home sleeping. He was really apologetic and in the end I had to say,
“Listen. It’s 2:30 in the afternoon on a Wednesday and I’m in bed taking a granny nap. As long as you don’t tell my boss that I went home to sleep then I forgive you”
But what I really wanted to say was,
“Listen, I can’t think of anyone else who I’d rather be woken up by. As long as you come and join me then I’ll forgive you”.
The new job has also taken a toll on the potential with Mr. London. I had to cancel on him when work went a lot later then expected (no big fricken surprise), then he had to cancel on me the second time round for the same reason. Man, if we had children, I fear we would be completely awful and neglectful parents. Uh… I mean… not that I think about having his babies or anything…. uh yeah… who am I kidding? I don’t even know if he likes me.
I did end up seeing him later in the week when I went to his agency to have a coffee with his boss. As soon as I walked through the doors, he was standing there waiting for me. But it was kinda weird and I felt no spark or butterflies. Of course I’m not going to write him off because of that. I figure we were just in professional mode. To be honest though, I brought him a block of rocky road wrapped up in brown paper, tied up in twine and planned to put it on his desk as a surprise because I am just so god damned sweet. I feel awful saying this, but when I didn’t get that jolt of excitement that I usually get when I see him, I decided to keep the rocky road and gave it to some of my girl friends!
teehehe… you can’t say I don’t have my priorities right!
- There Goes My Gun | Time: 11:52 am (UTC+8)
at least the week will be over soon! i get the same expectations with firms i like, i usually get disappointed with the reality
Comment by tiff — May 30, 2006 @ 6:43 am
Dude, working such long hours in Perth…! It’s Perth. Perth god damit. Even if you some how manage to make an impression, it’s still Perth. Redneck yobbos.
Comment by sweetfranky — June 4, 2006 @ 7:27 pm
Franky Lou - is that you????????????????
I am going to assume NOT.
But such bitter words could only come from someone who’s lived in Perth!
Firstly - you can’t honestly tell me there aren’t redneck yobbos in London, New York, Los Angeles, Tokyo, Sydney, Paris… etc…? I’ve lived in half of the cities I just mentioned and there are people that are equally as bad as redneck yobbos - and that is, arrogant city snobs.
Secondly, just because you’re in a big city doesn’t mean you’re going to make an impression. Living in a big city doesn’t make you brilliant. Living in a big city just means more competition. Lots of brilliant and talented people HEAD to big cities, it doesn’t mean they come from there.
Thirdly, please - you can’t tell me amazingly talented people haven’t come from Perth and made their mark in the world?
Comment by Stella — June 8, 2006 @ 2:21 pm