That’s Stella

I love dreams and fairy tales and yada yada, so I don’t take any pleasure in shattering dreams, but I like to quash any notion that life in New York is like Sex in the City. I am asked all the time from friends and family back in Perth if life here is really like that. My answer is NO. I mean honestly, if you ask me, the show just sets up women for disappointment.

The answer is YES if you happen to earn in the $200+k range, bear some rock stars love child, you come from a family of wealthy Europeans or your surname is Weinstein or Wintour, Trump or Murdoch.

Listen, just to get it out there, I am sure the directors at my agency are well into the $200+k income and they don’t come into work every day with a different pair of Manolos.

I received an email from this Sydney girl who found my email through some networking site and told me she was quitting her job, packing her bags and coming to NY to find a job in advertising. She asked me for advice and tips. When I asked her if she had ever been here before, her answer was ‘no’. So here’s everything I wanted to tell her, but didn’t have the heart to…

New York is tough. Ask any New Yorker and they won’t disagree. I’m not just talking career wise. Sure it’s really competitive and there are so many foreigners in this city climbing up the ladder, but living is tough here too. Living in New York is like being thrown into the deep end of adult hood. I can’t even explain to you how tough it is here. It just is. Sydney sider said she was use to high rent costs in Sydney. Right. I have no doubt it is, but she has no idea that what she’ll be paying here is for an apartment 1/2 the size of her Sydney apartment. It’s going to be old. It’s probably going to have some sort of pest problem. And she’s probably going to have to walk up 5, 6 or 7 flights of stairs to get to her shitty 3 bedroom apartment she shares with a couple of New York psychos. Apartment hunting in New York is like putting yourself on the dating market - and you face getting rejected if you don’t earn enough, there’s no chemistry, or they simply don’t like you.

Just to give you a bit of an insight into how bad the apartment market is here… when I was looking for an apartment here at the beginning of the year, I think I saw around 20 apartments in 3 days. Of those 20 apartments, 3 were actually liveable (read: no visible sightings of faeces, no visible signs of housemate mental psychosis, nothing fancy - just OK). Of those 18 that were unsuitable, one was not in fact a room, but a hallway. I shit you not. I went to see this brown stone apartment and loved the room, only to be told I wasn’t getting the room, I would be renting her $950/month hall way between her bedroom and the kitchen. The hallway was 2x3 metres. Enough said. Another place, the kitchen was tucked inside a cupboard. And another place there was faeces scattered along the bathroom wall.

Man, New York is fabulous! I love this city! But I also knew every time I’ve lived here what I was getting myself into.

So… all I’m saying is, beware naive women!

1. After work activity

I actually managed to finish work early on Friday (5pm) which is a huge accomplishment because I am usually out of the office by 7pm. When I was on my way home, I decided to stop off at one of my favorite cafes and had apple cider and a red velvet cup cake, plonked myself down in the corner of the cafe, read Elle and peopled watched on Bleecker Street. Awesome.

2. Walk the long way home

It takes me 8 minutes to walk to work. After work I’ve started walking the long way home, through my favorite beautiful streets in the West Village lined with brownstones and theatres and little cafes and looking out for any action happening in the Village. It is so relaxing.

3. Cooking

I would say 90% of Manhattan folk eat out every night or get delivery. Here’s why. People finish work late. Manhattenites have a big social life after work and that includes eating out with friends. Because there are SO many options for food. Because their kitchen is tiny, or they don’t have a kitchen. I shit you not. But it costs money eating out every night. And it’s not always good for you. So with a bit of inspiration from my dad (who was a chef) and the food pornographer, I have had SO much fun making yummy meals! I cooked mushroom and marscapone ravioli last night, vegetable fried rice the other night and this evening I made this old family recipe my dad taught me - a beef stew. As I was letting it simmer, I took the garbage downstairs and passed my neighbor who didn’t know I was cooking and said to his girlfriend “Wow, that smells so good”. I was giggling inside. hehe… My house mates LOVE it.

4. Reading

A couple months ago I didn’t have a TV and started reading novels for the first time since highschool! Haha. Bad I know. Anyway, now I am hooked and have to restrain myself from buying books. Instead I’ve signed up at the local library (which by the way use to be this beautiful church and has a turret!). Latest books I’ve loved are A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini (I cancelled a date to read the book - that good!), A Year in the Merde by Stephen Clarke (hilarious) and right now I’m reading Water for Elephants.

5. Dating

Some girls at work were doing research on markets and came across this statistic… 60% of women are married by the age of 25 years. I can’t remember if it was 60% or 70% but either way, the statistic is depressing. It’s not that I want to be married at my age, but I am 24 and no where near walking down the aisle. We were all talking about it, and apparantly this should exclude New York women, because the statistic would be more like 90% of women in New York are NOT married by the age of 30 years. There are 30+ year old Account Directors and Supervisors at my agency who are smart and stunningly beautiful and don’t have boyfriends and have been single for years. WTF!!!! I probably didn’t mention, but things are completely over with LA man so I am now officially on the market and have started getting to know someone…. but that is a whole new blog post.

I went to a meeting today. There were two representatives each from 4 different companies we work with. When I got there, I was told I was expected to present this powerpoint presentation on strategies and growth and benefits and propositions and other things I should know either from university or from 3 solid years in the industry, but always have to Google every now and then. I had 5 minutes before I had to start the presentation. Five solid minutes that I could’ve used to do some sort of preparation, but instead, I spent my minutes cursing myself for not listening to my inner self this morning when I wanted to call in sick and thought of ideas how I could make myself throw up without being obvious and sticking my fingers down my throat. I also wondered if I could fake some sort of convulsion or body fit in the conference room. I wondered if it was appropriate to cry. Fake an uncontrollable bladder. Call a life line. I wondered how much I loved my job and if I could just be comfortable looking really unprepared and face my director asking me to pack my bags. I was honestly suffering anxiety and wondered if the severity could prevent me from presenting. In probably the last 30 seconds before I was about to present, it hit me. The solution was clear.

Fake it.

I remember someone telling me that “confidence is a con” and in the last hour, I thought, there is no way I am going to lose my job over a poor presentation. So I faked it. I used some big words. I read off the slides and improvised on some points on the slide. I lied. I exaggerated. I used big hand gestures and looked people in the eye. And it worked. My director said I did a good job. I figured that unsureness and nervousness is really easy to pick up on and people are less likely to believe you, but put on a big show, and people will be mesmerized. Haha!!

It’s something I remind myself everyday. Is that strange? I live in the beautiful West Village - my favorite neighborhood in New York - and every morning I walk the 10 minutes it takes to get to work, I think the same thing every day “I am walking to work in New York”. But it’s not all birds whistling and crickets chirping in the morning, during the summer in particular, New York streets smells like a public urinal. This morning I nearly gagged at all the nasty smells. Pwoar.

I’ve started work at my dream agency and well, it’s tough! There’s already been a few late nights and lots of high expectations and some nasty people - mainly cranky old men who aren’t that taken with my Aussie charm and accent! My client came into town last week to meet me - they’re based in another state which means lots of traveling and frequent flyer points! Woo! I had spoken with my client on the phone before meeting him, and of course what I pictured on the other end of the phone was completely different to who I met. I pictured this burly, big, balding, middle aged family man who wore polo shirts with khaki pants and a crew cut hair style. So imagine my surprise when I meet this late 20ish/early 30ish, tall, dark and handsome, with all his thick brown hair, wearing navy blue pin striped shirt with charcoal slacks, stylish but modest GORGEOUS man! During our meeting, I randomly drifted off and wondered which celebrity bombshell I would need to look like to get his attention. (I settled on Angelina Jolie or Kate Beckinsale).

We took the client to this AMAZING restaurant for dinner. The chef is quite a celebrity and is seen on Iron Chef occasionally. Despite it only being around the corner from my apartment, there is no way I could ever been able to afford to go there so I’m glad I got a chance to put it on the company card. Haha. The food was really surprising and top quality and delicious!

Sorry for the poor updates. Hi to Andge *waves*. I was convinced I was talking to myself on here so show me some love and I’ll post some photos soon!

Hello again! Long time no see. Here’s what I’ve done in the last month…

Returned back to Australia
Yes. I wasn’t really planning to, but I made a mad dash back to Perth to process my working visa from there! I was initially going to go to London to do all the dirty work and sucking up to consulates, but there was this insane waiting period for interviews there and dad suggested I come back to Perth where I was more familiar with the visa process. It was SO amazing to head back to Perth. For the first time EVER, I wasn’t sad about leaving New York because I knew I’d be back within a couple of weeks.

Perth
I can’t describe to you the feeling when the plane touched down at Perth airport. I wanted to cry/jump in the air/run around in mad circles. I couldn’t wait to hug my mum and dad and pet Poodle. I couldn’t wait to see my best friends. I couldn’t wait to be at home, in my big house with nice big bed and nice big bathroom and big backyard. Everything in Perth seems so much bigger after you’ve been travelling around living in hotel rooms, or renting small apartments in New York.

Nasty Pranks
I didn’t tell one of my best friends Miss 23 that I was coming back to Perth. Instead, I told her my friend ‘Caroline’ from New York was visiting Australia and she was making a stop in Perth. ‘Caroline’ and Miss 23 organized to meet at a cafe one night so they could meet, and if only I could have captured the look on my best friends face when I showed up instead. HAHA. I know she will get me back.

Forgiving
Admittedly, I was most excited about seeing my old Poodle named Boxer. Of course I was excited about seeing my parents and friends, but I Skyped with them fairly regularly. I was SO happy to see my Poodle, but I learnt straight away I had some making up to do. I was always Boxers favorite. He use to always follow me around the house and sit with me in my room. But the first few days, he completely ignored me! I’d call him and he’d turn the other way and sit in our study. At first I thought he had forgotten me, but he’s no freakin’ goldfish. I’ve had him for 14 years and there’s no way he would’ve forgotten me after 6 months. I soon became his favorite again, so it killed me to have to leave him again…

Good Ol Friends
It was so frickin AWESOME to hang out with my friends again!! I had a welcome back dim sum lunch and all these boys from my old agency surprised me by coming, including my old managing director came to have some chickens feet. I hung out at my old work a bit having drinks like good ol times and realized how many great friends I made with my old colleagues and only hope I do the same at my new agency in New York.

Rekindling
My old crush found out I was back in town and said he wanted to take me out for lunch. We saw each other quite a bit and had long chats and shared a kiss on busy Rokeby Road. Sigh!

Goodbye - Take Two
After two weeks in Perth, I flew back to New York. It was harder to say goodbye this time round and there were many tears from mum and me because it would be awhile till I would be coming back home. Mum and dad say they’ll visit me in New York, but I don’t think they’re that keen. I mean, I don’t blame them. The plane trip is a bitch and NY is a busy, loud city, far from what Perth is.

Hell in the air
I spent a total of 35 hours on the plane and in transit at airports to get back to New York. Whilst I had rock star treatment at Singapore airport (family friend is a director there and organized for someone to collect my luggage, check in for me, and escorted me to the Sky Lounge and transit gates), my time at Qatar and Geneva Airport was tiring. I dreaded getting on the plane and I had screaming babies behind me, next to me and in front of me.

Perth in New York
One of my closest boy friends from Perth was actually in New York with his friend when I arrived so as soon as I arrived back in New York, I had a much needed shower and headed out at 10pm to show them my second home. It was fabulous to show my friends what I love about this city. One night we were out walking and I spotted film trailers. Turns out they were filming a new movie with Kirsten Dunst and Ryan Gosling. We ended up walking down 7th Avenue side by side with Dunst so I’m happy they got to see a bit of film and celebrity action. The boys were stoked!

New New New
I move into my new West Village apartment tomorrow and start my new job on Monday! Scary stuff. New beginnings. More of an update on that later!